10 Holiday Songs You’ll Never Hear at the Mall

In this season of music sweet enough to rot your teeth, here’s a medley of truly bizarre holiday songs wholly inappropriate for your family gatherings and office parties.

15 Nov 2006 --- Snoop Dogg --- Image by © MR Photo/Corbis Outline
15 Nov 2006 — Snoop Dogg — Image by © MR Photo/Corbis Outline

Ramones – “Merry Christmas (I Don’t Want to Fight Tonight)”

Spotlight lyrics: Snowball fighting, it’s so exciting baby.

Though undoubtedly pioneers of punk, the Ramones couldn’t escape the trappings of 80s pop Christmas music. This track appeared on the 1989 Brain Drain album along with the infamously popular “Pet Sematary.” Despite the holiday theme, the song manages to keep a rebellious edge because even though I don’t want to fight on Christmas, any other night I’m down.

Read the full piece at Dirge Magazine.

About Carter

Theodore Carter is the author of Stealing The Scream, Frida Sex Dreams and Other Unnerving Disruptions, and The Life Story of a Chilean Sea Blob and Other Matters of Importance. His fiction has appeared in The North American Review, Pank, Necessary Fiction, and elsewhere. Carter’s street art projects have earned attention from The Washington Post, The Washington City Paper, several D.C. TV news stations, and other outlets. In 2019, he organized the Night of 1,000 Fridas, an event spanning 5 continents that brought over 1,000 images of Frida Kahlo out into public view on the same night. More at www.theodorecarter.com.

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